At this moment Thanksgiving break can't quite come fast enough, though if it were already here I'd be in trouble! It is that time of the semester when I am feeling a bit overwhelmed by the papers and tests and general information that has been coming my way and am ready to run away for a while.
Yesterday we went down to Moffett Field Chapel again, participating in their monthly fellowship potluck after the service. It was a great chance to start to settle into that community as members and friends instead of strangers. I really feel that there is a sense of belonging developing for me that I hadn't expected to find. Perhaps I am finally settling into my life as a military spouse and realizing that there really are things that my peers outside of the military just don't quite understand. I know that sounds dramatic, and that in all reality my spouse is in the Reserves and not deployed somewhere overseas. But there really are things that set us apart from the people around me both at school and in Berkeley in general.
The afternoon yesterday was spent dawdling over to Hwy 1 and driving up the coast through Half-Moon Bay and up into the City. It was a great way to get away for a little bit, though my papers were never too far from my mind. There is something refreshing about the ruggedness of the coast here that gives me perspective and space when I begin to get claustrophobic about my schoolwork and reminds me that God is the one in charge of everything - even those pesky papers and Greek verbs that I wrestle so mightily with.
Perhaps the reason I struggle so much with my papers is that in my writing of them I am allowing myself to be written as well. I know that my first paper for History of Christianity deeply affected how I have looked at the tools we gain through learning about historical theology and struggles and how that information can affect current ministry and theology. It isn't just that there are words on a page, those words are a part of my life and affect my current and future ministry deeply. They teach me about myself as much as they are my expression of my encounter with the subject being written about and the sources I am writing from.
It is off to class and then more paper wrestling for me...